An Interview with Jeffrey Dahmer

I watch crime documentaries obsessively. It worries me.

Then again sometimes they tickle my absurdist funny bone.

Sitting down for an interview with Jeffrey Dahmer. I mean, how do you sit down and talk with Jeffrey Dahmer and not SCREAM AND NEVER STOP SCREAMING.

Kafkaesque indeed.

Dahmer's dad thought he was shy. Jeffery objects. No, he preferred not to share any thoughts or emotions.

and the interviewer asks Jeffery: why not?

why not?

well maybe cuz

HIS THOUGHTS WERE ABOUT KILLING DISMEMBERING AND EATING PEOPLE. AND HAVING SEX WITH THEM. NOT NECESSARILY IN THAT ORDER.

Maybe that;s why he chose not to share them.

Then there was another interview with the father on Oprah. This father is like totally bland science guy. Monotone. Mild as milk. Thick glasses. Earnest. He tells Oprah a rambling story about trying to get teenaged Jeffery to open a box. Jeffery demurred. Dad insisted. Jeffery resisted. Dad let it go. And muses he would not have known what he'd have done if Jeffery had indeed opened the box.

and Oprah asks, "well, what was in the box?"

"a human head," Dad replies. Deadpan.

SCREAM SCREAM SCREAM AND NEVER STOP SCREAMING

Jeffery died in prison. He was beaten to death by his fellow inmates. Sometimes there is justice.